{"list_data":{"category_id":"1","aim_love_num":"0","article_title":"真正的教养,是往里看","articleid":"6258918","comment_count":"409","copyfrom":"人民日报微信公号","gov_id":"0","help_state":"","help_status":"0","id":6371422,"image":[{"url":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/show_type/201808/201808151832422294.png","thumbnail":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/show_type/201808/201808151832422294.png","desc":"","sort":"","is_thumb":0}],"img_count":0,"image_type":"1","is_end":0,"is_gov":0,"is_help":0,"is_video":1,"join_count":558553,"likes_count":"2007","love_num":"0","news_link":"","news_timestamp":"1637847261","notice":0,"read_count":558553,"share_image":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/show_type/201808/201808151832428517.png","show_num":0,"tags":"","title":"真正的教养,是往里看","admin_name":"吴玥","to_category":0,"turns_image":"","view":0,"vote_name":"","vote_info":[],"view_type":"audio","comment":[]},"data":{"view_type":"audio","updatetime":1713981975,"news_timestamp":"1637847261","news_datetime":"2021-11-25 21:34","description":"对每一个人都能温润有礼,才是真正的高贵。","guidance":"","copyfrom":"人民日报微信公号","authors":"","category_id":"1","extended_type":1,"is_night":0,"up_id":0,"up_article_id":0,"down_id":0,"down_article_id":0,"title_inner":"真正的教养,是往里看","title_down":"","title":"真正的教养,是往里看","short_title":"","admin_name":"吴玥","state":0,"show_help":1,"is_help":1,"aim_love_num":"0","share_title":"真正的教养,是往里看","share_image":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/show_type/201808/201808151832428517.png","read_count_show":1,"read_count":558553,"love_num":"0","likes_count":"2007","comment_count":"409","audio":0,"download_app":{"view_type":"audio","title":"真正的教养,是往里看","support_version":6230,"news_type":"cms","id":6371422,"file_size":"1.5"},"vote_name":"","vote_info":[],"contents":"

\"截图20211125212120.png?x-oss-process=style/w10\"/

1

有一个很有意思的实验:实验人员在街角安装了摄像头,每个走过的人都很安静优雅,甚至还会捡起地上的垃圾。可当监控被收走后,地上多了不少的垃圾。在人前,每个人都会习惯性地展示出自己美好的一面,但是一个人真正的教养是装不出来的。它是人前的约束,更是人后的自律。

曾经看到过一则新闻,在一家书店里,一位穿着阔气的女士,对一位小姑娘指责了十几分钟。究竟发生了什么事情?原来是这位女士带的孩子太吵闹,小姑娘轻声提醒了几句,那位女士便怒不可遏指责地小姑娘多管闲事;同时,还炫耀自己穿名牌、老公是高管。

但其实,真正优雅的人,他们低调、谦和、温润、有力量,从不会把优越感写在脸上。因为他们不需要通过贬低别人,来垫高自己。

2

看一个人是不是真的有教养,不要看他如何对待比自己身份高的人,而要看他如何对待每一个人。对每一个人都能温润有礼,才是真正的高贵。

一次,朋友去她的一位同事家里做客。同事家里雇了一位保姆,临别时同事发现玻璃餐台被水果弄湿后,保姆没有按照要求擦干净,便大发雷霆地责骂,然后立马转过头来笑着送别朋友。那一刻,朋友说她心里打了个寒战,从此疏远了这位同事。

你对待每一个人的态度,就是你的教养。有教养的人,不会心安理得地指使清洁阿姨,不会对外卖小哥颐指气使,而是心怀悲悯,发自内心地尊重、体谅和友爱他人。这样的人,才能获得别人长久的青睐和信任。

3

什么是教养?它是一个人言行中的分寸、交往中的包容、举止间的温柔、心底里的善良,是藏不住也装不出的灵魂的深度和生命的高贵。有人说:“真正的教养,不是往外看,是往里看。对自己有要求,再把这种要求,潜移默化成做人做事的准则。”

教养说起来很大,但做的其实都是小事,就像这些日常生活中的细节,处处都包含着自身的教养:尊重别人的不同,哪怕别人的行为你完全不理解;尊重不同的喜好,不要随意评价别人喜欢的东西;服务员、快递员、外卖员为你提供服务时,请说一声谢谢;别人发给你的微信或短信,尽量都回复,晚一点也没有关系……

也许你已经发现,在以上这些关于教养的细节中,最基础的一点就是:心中有别人。无论做什么事情,都设身处地为别人考虑,将心比心,时刻想着身边的人,就是好的教养。

来源:综合洞见(ID:DJ0012398)、央视新闻 | 主播:蓝艳

","content_imgs":[{"pic":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/ueditor/image/20211125/1637846498865107.png","width":682,"height":469}],"image":[{"url":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/show_type/201808/201808151832422294.png","thumbnail":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/show_type/201808/201808151832422294.png","desc":"","sort":"","is_thumb":0}],"seminar_id":0,"is_nreading_seminar":0,"head_linkdata":[],"show_image":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/show_type/201808/201808151832422294.png?x-oss-process=style/w10","audio_url":"https://rmrbcmsonline.peopleapp.com/upload/voice/202111/a09f9fbf566959250a3ccf43ae7a4712.mp3","audio_play_time":"05:10","gov":[]},"result":{"update_time":"1713532765","errorCode":"0","errorMsg":"ok"}}